Archive for the ‘jessica’ Category

THE ART OF THE FART, Hendrix Osiris Merlin Nash, Doom and Spiderman attacking

January 11, 2017

PRODUCT WARNINGS: I shouldn’t buy La Molisana pasta sauce because I can’t even open the lids with the jar opener! Similarly, I shouldn’t buy Welch’s prune juice because I can’t open the lid without the help of the jar opener! THE ART OF THE FART! (by Stephen Bryant) From Reddit in September 2016: Hendrix Osiris […]

Don’t ask me why I post things on MY OWN Facebook page!!!!!

July 10, 2016

I’m SO tired of people asking me *why* I am posting things on my own Facebook page. I obviously posted whatever it is (status / link / photo / video / etc.) for MY OWN FUCKING REASONS. You are NOT allowed to ask me why unless you think I’m going off the deep end, and […]

Bacon! / KVIIIlyn, N’Golo Kanté, Rupert Wingfield-Hayes, soap for your teeth

June 21, 2016

I got my hydro bill in the mail today, but can’t pay it till tomorrow. From Brett: Bacon is the chocolate of the meat world! From Reddit: KVIIIlyn?! N’Golo Kanté?! Rupert Wingfield-Hayes?! From Julie: Soap for your teeth?!

Church dream / Glass toilet / Daniel Noody being arrested for exposing himself?!

April 25, 2016

I had a dream where the VCEFC was meeting in an auditorium, and I sat in the row ahead of Erin and others. Then I noticed what was actually said in the green bulletin: Billy’s son Benjamin had died in a car accident, and then there was a paragraph detailing how certain ex-members were terrible. […]

Smelley-Bacon, Salm-Minnella, Dodge-Ball, and other bad hyphenated names!

February 2, 2016

Smelley-Bacon! Salm-Minnella! Dodge-Ball! Street-Walker! Burd-Licker! Wise-Schmuck! Eaton-Cox! Kalla-Plummer! Bouy-George! Swift-Kalonick! Brest-Mash! Strange-Slappey! Steele-Kage! Hay-Saylors! King-Bishop! Dick-Harden!

Godown-Gross, Burns-Butts, Johnson-Wacker, and other bad hyphenated names!

January 30, 2016

Godown-Gross! Burns-Butts! Johnson-Wacker! Hunt-Kapture! Johnson-Holder! Baer-Teets! (Bare Tits) Beaver-Aiken! Butts-Fudger! Dueitt-Kute! Fang-Dang! Makin-Peeples! Moore-Drummer! Nutter-Boner! Puls-Johnson! Seeman-Sample! De Armendi-Backs!

Great timing on the guest parking pass, Amacon… / Baby Names in Decline

August 8, 2015

Amacon gave the apartment building residents some parking passes yesterday; it would have been way more convenient last year when Mike was around this place a lot, so that he might not have to park his car on Azure Road all the time! At least today is much more calm than exactly a year ago! […]

Yes, he DID skip out on his bar tab! / Unable to eat diarrhea?! / JESACA?!

August 1, 2015

Steph called earlier to see whether I’d be okay since she’d clicked on my check-in at the Pint to find out that it had been closed for a private event at 8 PM. Lisa had told her that I knew what I was doing. Hey, we were kicked out shortly before that! I told her […]

My literary name / Unverse, coments, Ruffini the dog, and “you inventory”

July 28, 2015

Last night, I heard that the Seattle true crime writer Ann Rule has died! I set up a food shopping appointment with Barry for Friday at noon earlier today. Then I went to London Drugs at 5:45 to get an extra red washcloth and extra red handtowel before I forgot. I also got two regular […]

4-3 overtime loss, dragon staircase, shitting in the yard, Lala, and Tymont

March 28, 2015

Vancouver played Dallas at 7 tonight, and we were lucky that it went into overtime, but Dallas won 4-3 with less than a minute to go. I also banned and unbanned Brett Payne from the Fearsome Vancouver Canucks Fans because he sent me a Facebook message to say that his account had been hacked. DRAGON […]