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Archive for the ‘jokes’ Category

A poop emoji A-line dress! / Crapstone, Devon, England?! / Poo Goo Unicorn Poo!

July 6, 2019

From Melissa and Buzzfeed Canada: A poop emoji A-line dress! From the Daily Mail: Crapstone is in Devon, England?! From Julie: Poo Goo Unicorn Poo at CVS! Feels like liquid, plays like goo! Advertisements

Happy Canada Day 2019! / Canada Day, cool Canada flag, glowing hearts!

July 1, 2019

HAPPY CANADA DAY 2019! 152 YEARS OLD! I went out at 2 on a 401 to get Rubbermaid Take-Along containers and on-sale pads x2 at London Drugs, getting home at 2:20 on a 407. Rubbermaid Flex and Seal containers – 1.5 gallons or 5.6 litres! Rubbermaid Take-Alongs containers – 3.7 litres! From Julie: Happy Canada […]

Electricity puns in comic form! / Hell and laptop sleeves! / Tiit Helimets?!

May 28, 2019

I showered today, and noticed that I can actually read the names and numbers on my Caller ID for the first time since my eye surgery on the 8th – NICE! From Nita: Sparky! Your mother and I are SHOCKED at your CURRENT behavior! Until you learn to CONDUCT yourself properly, you’re GROUNDED! From Julie: […]

Jack Daniels is from Chile?! / Mrs. Weiner and Mrs. Butt?! / How To Write Good!

April 14, 2019

Jack Daniels is from Chile?! Mrs. Weiner and Mrs. Butt taught at the Jewish Community Centre?! From Grammarly: How To Write Good, by Frank L. Visco! Caveat emptor. Carpe diem. O si villi, si ergo, fortibus is in ero. Et tu, brute. My several years in the word game have learnt me several rules: 1. […]

It’s pronounced ZED. Not ZEE. Zed. I AM CANADIAN! / THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF SUICIDE?

March 27, 2019

From Julie M. and Only in Canada: It’s pronounced ZED. Not ZEE. Zed. I am Canadian. 7/01/13! From my Endlessly Engrossing Bathroom Reader #22: THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF SUICIDE?!

Leprechaun with green beer! / Airhorns in class! / Kiss me, I’m Highrish!

March 17, 2019

COFFEE TIME! The Canucks played the Stars at 4 today… the game went into overtime and a shootout after Vancouver gave up ANOTHER 2-0 lead. At least the Canucks WON 3-2 this time! A leprechaun with green beer and four-leaf clovers: Happy St. Patrick’s Day! From FML: Today, I fell asleep in class. As a […]

Incorrect words and phrases! / Commas and consonants being sentenced! / Yamir?!

March 4, 2019

It’s NATIONAL GRAMMAR DAY today! From Kelly and Clarkson Hammond and May FANS: 10 Words and Phrases People Say Incorrectly! Supposedly, for all intents and purposes, regardless, I couldn’t care less, espresso, specifically, et cetera, I saw it, of utmost importance, and I need to lie down. From Pete, Punny Pete, and Grammarly Punography: Eight […]

Louisiana State Troopers not having balls! / Ashley Heavy Runner Loring?!

February 14, 2019

I discovered that Jason Lam and Sarah Quelch had unfriended me – oh well, the Awana and Palmer days were long ago! The Canucks played the Kings at 7:30 tonight… the game went to overtime (thanks to Gaudette!) plus a shootout. BOESER GOT THE GOAL TO WIN 4-3! I also showered today. From Kenny and […]

Taking the road less traveled, Tim Burr, Raymond Burr, the cat being fed already

January 15, 2019

I hung around Deb and Dylan’s today since the paint dude was coming by to finish up whatever he did yesterday, and he left at 10:30. SO EARLY! Managed to use up a lot of time by being on Discord and Reddit mobile, then ate my packed lunch of leftovers from last night: chicken wings […]

Fassad is cheered up, thanks to his banana! / Pigmask apologizing profusely!

November 17, 2018

COFFEE TIME! The Canucks played Montreal at 4 today, and lost 3-2. I had to finally email Eric M. to find out that he’s getting better, but is leaning toward staying home tomorrow to maximize recovery, so he advised me to research alternative transportation options. Maybe Eric Ho can at least drive me home, haha! […]