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Archive for the ‘2013’ Category

Rugged Talk Like A Pirate Day tampons! / Larketa Collier?! / Ultros octopus ink!

September 19, 2017

It’s Talk Like A Pirate Day today! From Reddit: Blackbeard Brand Rugged Tampons! No scents! No pastels! No scurvy! “Fer pluggin’ the bloody hole afore th’ sharks smell ye!” Comfortable plastic applicator won’t keelhaul yer nethers! Larketa Collier?! Ultros the OCTOPUS attacking Edgar, Sabin, Terra, and Banon with INK on the Lethe River in FINAL […]

Zakiya, Savieon, JaQuan, Centil, Shawnika, Tarnesha, Shamell, Romeikie, Candra

August 16, 2017

UGH! I just had to kill at least one more insect crawling on my computer desk! Zakiya / Tarwaskia / Andre’ / Savieon / JaQuan / Dana’ / Centil / Shawnika / Tarnesha / LaTonya / Romeikie / Shamell / Candra?! Ah, ghetto names…

Love In The Time Of Cholesterol?! / MANIFOLD DESTINY?! / 450 Facebook friends!

July 28, 2017

LOVE IN THE TIME OF CHOLESTEROL?! MANIFOLD DESTINY?! The one! The only! GUIDE TO COOKING ON YOUR CAR ENGINE?! I’ve made 450 Facebook friends! Andrea in 2007, Chrissy in 2008, Julie S. in 2008, Holly in 2011, Pete in 2012, Dustin in 2013, Mikki in 2013, Michelle S. in 2014, and John Powell in 2015!

Christine Michael, wasting time with online quizzes, Rimuldar wedding rings

February 2, 2017

The Canucks played San Jose at 7 tonight, and lost 3-1. At least Philip Larsen got his first Canucks goal? From Reddit and ESPN: The Seattle Seahawks have a black male player named CHRISTINE MICHAEL?! From Julie S. and Cat Shit: A cat with the words “When you have a lot to do, but you’re […]

My Galloglass dragon looks like Norman Reedus?! / Fanny Chmelar the skiier?!

January 31, 2017

According to Meaww’s “Who’s your lookalike?” quiz, my Galloglass dragon looks like a smoking Norman Reedus. Weird! Julie S. found that out on July 11. From Reddit: Fanny Chmelar?! (fanny smeller)

Christmas is a human name?! / Santa J. Ono is the UBC president?!

December 23, 2016

Christmas is a human name?! From Reddit: Santa J. Ono is the UBC president?!

Gay wrestler boyfriends?! / David Dollar was an economist?!

September 20, 2016

Julie S. was watching STEVE WILKOS on July 22: “Is my boyfriend a gay wrestler?” That’s a crazy talk show premise, man! He was indeed a gay wrestler, haha. From Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader: David DOLLAR was an ECONOMIST at the World BANK?!

Shemales, dentist Dr. Ronald Toothman, Dr. Allan Doctor, Judge Igor Judge

September 7, 2016

According to some dumbshit shemale named Kyle on Reddit, I cannot categorically say that my brother and some of his male friends whom I’ve known for 35 years at most are not biological males because I have never seen their penises or testicles. Biological males “do not exist” and are “pageantry.” What?! He is way […]

Ward Hurt Goodenough, Cody Goodnight, mistaken devil not withstanding the storm

August 23, 2016

Vanessa called at 1:15 to complain about her narcissistic mother-in-law’s WTF comments about Buddhist statues at an Asian restaurant (“what is THAT doing here?!”), Jason defending his mom (“That’s just how she is!” “Racist and bigoted is being old-school?! She should be reincarnated as a visible minority!”), his mom being overly Christian (I said that […]

Help a thief! / Modern-day miracles / Colt .45 Stratemeyer

July 13, 2016

I called the Save-On Foods customer service line to see if any of the Vancouver stores had those ghost pepper and bourbon chicken wings (yay for my Facebook wall post!), and it turns out that the Save-On nearest Main and 16th apparently has plenty of them in the freezer on Aisle 5. Sweet! Daniel M. […]