It’s been an interesting year. I’ve been dealing with a breakup and its aftermath, but think I’m finally feeling better. I’ve been doing this for eleven years!

1. Christmas cards: Yay for mail which isn’t bills or junk!

2. Postcards! I like seeing stuff from around the world.

3. Stickers for me and my nephews!

4. Bookmarks since I read a lot!

5. Dragons! I’m a dragon in the Chinese zodiac.

6. Books about the quirkiness of our world!

7. Chocolate or candy from all over the world!

8. Gift cards to places like London Drugs, Save-On, and Safeway!

9. Random surprises!

10. Hockey stuff!


Darren More added me to Facebook from the FEARSOME VANCOUVER CANUCKS FANS group last night, so that’s fine.

The day I lost control!

Being selectively social, condoms as Christmas ornaments, a crying boy, Johnny Dickshot, Filet Minyon I’m not anti-social. I’m selectively social. There’s a difference.

Condoms as Christmas ornaments!

Crying boy!

Johnny Dickshot was an outfielder for the Pittsburgh Pirates!

Filet Minyon!

An Israeli baby girl named Like after the Facebook LIKE button!


The Canucks played the Wild at 4 today, and barely managed to squeak out a 3-2 win!


Phat Ho!

Ok Suk Whang!

Evelyn Sackrider is a real estate agent!


I left for Harmony’s at 4:30, and just managed to get the 401. I must have just missed the 3 bus because I had to wait for 15 minutes for that bus. Dad thought I was late, but at least I got there before Harmony did! Hiero wanted to show me his blocks, while Ayler said “Auntie here!” When Harmony got home, we discussed congee / eggs / cheese / vegetables / Hiero giving me his kale / tortilla chips / pumpkin soup / chicken / noodles / adult saliva not needing to be shared with children’s saliva, the freezing weather, Ayler bending his alphabet cards (“No bending!” I told him), Ayler pulling at the bling on my shirt (“PULL!” he said), Jon’s birthday being tomorrow, the kids learning their parents’ real names, Chrystal now being an aunt, Melia being due soon herself, Dallas now being married, Ayler wanting me to give him his medicine / floss and brush his teeth, “bye bye music!”, and Hiero crying when I left him alone in his crib because I had to go home soon. Ayler knows the routine: “Auntie home!” At least he hugged me for a while after hitting me twenty minutes prior. Since I just missed the 3 bus at that stop, I had to wait 15 more minutes for a bus, and got home at 10 on a 407.

After Lucas and Boney say “no” to taking a shower in Club Tittiboo’s fancy attic room, Violet / Kumatora will tell them to “Just take a damn shower already!!”

Why do we feel safe under blankets? It’s not like a murderer will come in thinking, “I’m gonna ki… Ah, damn! She’s under a blanket!”


From r/funny and Reddit: Stayfree pads for Dad for Father’s Day!

Awesome spelling, Tara Cherry, Tiny Kox, Harold Ballitch, Andre Muff, Coco Crisp It’s awesome when you’re spelling a long word, expecting auto-correct to pitch in, and you realized that you NAILED IT.

Tara Cherry is a gynecologist…

Tiny Kox!

Harold Ballitch is a doctor!

Andre Muff!

Coco Crisp!


I showered and did my laundry today with my newfound free time!

Seven bar jokes involving grammar and punctuation by Eric K. Auld!

1. A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
2. A dangling modifier walks into a bar. After finishing a drink, the bartender asks it to leave.
3. A question mark walks into a bar?
4. Two quotation marks “walk into” a bar.
5. A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to drink.
6. The bar was walked into by the passive voice.
7. Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They drink. They leave.

Engrish at its finest: No Penis Zhang?!

Tiny Dick Khumalo!

Lucious Pusey!

M. Peanisbreath!


I got small group emails about a Christmas gift basket and meeting at McDonalds again – it would be great for my budget if we could quit meeting there! Yes, I did tell them that. I also saw on Facebook that Mike and Emily are now parents to baby Ethan – born yesterday on the 21st at 3:35 PM! Chrystal emailed me about that and wanted to change tomorrow’s meetup to early December instead since she’ll be with them after work; sure, why not? Dec. 2, 4, 10, and 11 work for me! (Wednesday, Friday, Thursday, and Friday) The Canucks played the Devils at 7 tonight, and lost 3-2 with a buzzer beater.

Sheila Dikshit!

F. You!

Charity Beaver!

Roasted pork loin with cider and chunky applesauce!


Rich Will Wanket is a real estate agent in Minneapolis!

Yolanda Squatpump!

Dick Tips is in the business of compassion!

Here’s a garden with flowers!


I left for Harmony’s at 8:35 after swearing at my thick coat’s zipper for five minutes straight before I put the coat on the floor first. Then I decided to bring along Jon’s birthday card, Almond Joys, Russell Stover coconut chocolates, the Waterbridge Belgian chocolate seashells, Theo Chocolate organic fair trade chocolate bars (coconut and orange), Moritz Icy Squares x2, and Brockman’s hazelnut Truffini. When I told Harmony later that the candy this year didn’t contain alcohol in case the kids got into it (and therefore would not be accidentally drunk), she appreciated this. I just managed to get the 401, and the 25 bus waited for me as I crossed the road from King Edward station in the really cold weather – amazing, as I thought I’d just miss it! At Brighouse, I saw a guy carry a stroller complete with baby INSIDE up the escalator at the Skytrain station! His wife seemed to think that was an okay idea, since they wouldn’t have to wait for the elevator! Isn’t that dangerous?!

We talked about Ayler playing with the CDs, putting a Yo La Tengo song on repeat, the ice and frost outside, mittens, gloves, hats, salmon / broccoli / grains / eggs / avocado / cheese / bread for lunch, raisins / pears / bananas / walnuts for snack time in the jumping program, Ayler and Hiero wanting to watch the hockey players instead (one of the guys let Ayler have a hockey stick and orange ball for a while), the balls and blocks, a soft bowling set, “find yo-yo! / owl! / duck!”, zebras as cows, and Hiero being tired since he got up at 6 AM. Mom seemed to think that Harmony could go to church to take in Jon’s First Nations talk since they had child care – NO! We also discussed medicine, Ayler giving me his rice cakes, Ayler having fun and laughing when he put his foot in the ABC box and then tried putting a huge alphabet card over it (good times!), dark chocolate or unsweetened almond milk, Hiero’s colorful toy gears, Ayler trying to pull my bling off my shirt, my red toque / Canucks gloves / zipper, Ayler hitting me, and future Saturdays. Ayler wanted to hold my hands a lot during the jumping program, which is fine.

When I left Harmony’s, I actually saw Roller Skate Girl on Main and 16th pretending to direct traffic. Then I went to McDonalds so I could redeem Sharon’s last Monopoly prize for a free medium fries, then got home at 3:10 on a 401. The Canucks played the Blackhawks at 7 tonight, and THEY FINALLY WON, 6-3! Daniel Sedin had a hat trick, Alex Burrows had an empty-net goal to move past Greg Adams in the all-time franchise standings, and it was pretty entertaining for once!

This door is alarmed, the window is startled, and the floor is somewhat taken aback!

If Lucas and Boney try to leave Club Tittiboo after they’ve gone into the DCMC concert, various people bump into them. This prevents them from actually leaving, and forces the story to continue. Man: “Huh? This isn’t the restroom!”

Baccio: “Oh. This isn’t the dressing room.”


I didn’t know that alcohol was flu shots at Walgreens!

This kid is most thankful for his penis!

Here’s a creepy version of Mario, Princess Peach, and Luigi!

Harry Bushrod is a real estate agent!

Gaye Males is another real estate agent!

BJ Cobbledick!

Quindarious Gooch! (Wesley says he looks like a TETRIS piece!)


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 335 other followers