Epixome
This is CRAZY LAND.

May
20

From Julie: Brandi is perfectly fine, but Treveon and Keisha?!

From Julie: Amaya?!

From Julie: Jaliah?!

From Julie: Keven?! BAD SPELLING OF KEVIN!

From Julie: Ozell?!

From Bored Panda: Dick Shoemaker?!

From Bored Panda: Goldie Lock?!

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May
19

Are You a Brownie or a Cookie?

You Are A Cookie!

You are an independent and versatile person. You can roll with life’s changes quite well.
You are resilient and optimistic. You see the glass of milk as half full, even if you’ve been burned before.

You are big on boundaries – what’s yours is yours, and you aren’t about to share what you have your heart set on.
That being said, you do live a life of abundance and have extra on hand for others. Who ever bakes just one cookie?

(yum, cookies!)

Are You Middle Class?

You Are Not Middle Class!

When it comes to social status, you are an outlier. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing at all.
You may be upper class or even out of sight rich – in which case, congratulations to you!

You may be working class or even poor, and that’s fine as well. Maybe you’re still working your way up in the world.
Or another possibility is that you’re just not willing to play the status game. No matter what, people wouldn’t call you average!

What’s Your Muslim Name?

Your Muslim Name Is: Saesha Zeba!

Kindness is a mark of faith, and whoever is not kind has no faith.

Are You a Hipster or a Yuppie?

You Are A Hipster!

You like the best things in life, but they aren’t always the finest things in life. You value quality and craftsmanship.
You are an artsy person, and you’re always dabbling in something. You’re too creative to be a straight up consumer.

You are the type who is cool without trying. You just seem to sense a trend is in the air before it becomes mainstream.
You probably wouldn’t call yourself a hipster, but you know deep down that you’re a little hip. It’s just effortless for you.

What’s Your Love Language?

Your Love Language is Quality Time!

For you, the best things about love are indeed free. You just simply like being with your partner.
You’d think that time together would be the easiest thing in the world, but true quality time is a rare gift… one you totally appreciate.

You love to receive a little undivided attention. No devices allowed! You value time just talking and connecting with your sweetie.
Even making dinner together and watching a movie can be an amazing night for you. It’s all about the company!

May
19

From r/hockey: A Detroit Red Wings player is named Martin Frk. His last name has no vowels, JUST LIKE MINE!

From Julie: Jamar?!

From Julie: Angel is Jesus’s wife?! IRONY OR A QUIRKY COINCIDENCE!

From Julie: Kenyatta?! I remember that name from WHAT NOT TO NAME YOUR BABY by Joe Borgenicht…

May
18

I did laundry today.

From Julie: Rhuheem?! It is RAHIM, not Rhuheem! Gross!

From Julie: Laquita?!

From Julie: Bentlee?!

From Julie: Venus?! I once knew someone named Venus Leung at VCEFC… then there is the minor EARTHBOUND character, the Fourside singer!

From Julie: Kyrstin?! BAD SPELLING of Kristin or Kirsten?!

From Julie: Michael is fine (unless you are talking about my INTJ ex Mike), but Isiah?! BAD SPELLING OF ISAIAH!

From Julie: Sahar is a girl?! Like the Sahara Desert?!

From Julie: Aziz?! I know there is that comedian named Aziz something, but STILL!

From Bored Panda: A.J. Kant?!

May
17

I texted Chinese Eric on and off today, and he wanted to know what kind of food he should pick up since I was home by 4:10 on a 407. I said nothing, but I should have gotten him to get the Dr. Oetker cheesecakes from Safeway or the hazelnut M and M candies! When he got here at 4:50 after the annoying parking pass business, he ate most of the Tropical Salsa kettle chips and most of the Old Dutch Humpty Dumpty cheese sticks: Habanero with Blue Cheese! Yes, of course he could open the window, and he asked me whether I had any of “those chips.” Turns out he meant the Indomie Goreng chips, and the London Drugs near his place is out of the way, so I guess I’ll pick some up and he can pay me back next time he comes over. Gotta keep the receipt, for sure!

We talked about fast goals, the St. Louis Blues / San Jose Sharks playoff game and referee controversy, the Toronto Raptors / Milwaukee Bucks basketball game (I heard squeaking – that was the shoes on the court), Kawhi Leonard (what a name…), Lebron James, white Eric, Christon’s wedding, the FARTING ANIMALS coloring book, his asking his mom about surgery, my text messages being “a lot to read” while driving (just do it…), some CD release party / gig that Jon had invited us both to, and my surgery. Yep, it was a good hangout – he left at 7:40, so I could relax and finally start time by myself. Today was pretty busy! Maybe we CAN hang out next time for the final Stanley Cup playoff round! “I have a gift for you – have a salsa chip!” Haha!

Chatime BC now has a red dragonfruit drink called HIDDEN DRAGON?! AWESOME!

Dr. Oetker just came out with Chocolate Brownie cheesecake?!

Dr. Oetker just came out with Wildberry cheesecake?!

Dr. Oetker just came out with Salted Caramel cheesecake?!

Dr. Oetker just came out with Strawberry Cheesecake?!

M and M Hazelnut Spread candies!

Konstantine Sepsis?!

May
17

I went out at 2 to see Rachel at The Caring Place on a 414, and pleasantly discovered that the three nearby bus stops have FINALLY been liberated from construction and are now operational again! WOO! I definitely had to text Paulo to let him know, especially since they’d just been officially reinstated yesterday! After talking about stuff and fulfilling a biological purpose, I got home at 4 on a 407 after waiting for late buses.

From Julie M. and CHEATERS: Kennethia Barnes?!

From Vanessa and the Richmond News: Emotions Paradise Universe?! What a name change from an Iraqi name!

May
16

I had a chocolate muffin, coffee, and pear slices as breakfast before Deb dropped me off near Brighouse Station. The one-week followup went pretty well at the eye clinic: NO MORE GLASSES FOR NOW! I decided to get a NEW McDonalds Chocolate Nanaimo Bar McFlurry at the Broadway McDonalds, but that was very disappointing… YUCKY coconut flakes! Then I went back to Deb and Dylan’s on a 407, but checked out the nearby M and M Meat Shops since I’m rarely out this way: Cilantro and Lime basmati rice, Brown Basmati and Wild Rice, and Long Grain White Rice in microwaveable packages. I saw some BAD SPELLING at the Chateau Quality Drycleaners: HOW DO YOU MISSPELL “COMFORTERS”?!

Eventually, I had fried rice with chicken and sriracha sauce for flavor as a real lunch. Vicky, Jason, baby Lucas, Pastor Dan, and white Eric all came over tonight for dinner: Pizza Hut Supreme pizza x2, quinoa salad, Build Your Own Taco from Costco, Welch’s white grape juice, boxed Pinot Grigio wine, French bread, prosciutto, coffee, tea, cantaloupes, and Two Bite Brownies! We talked about small group memories, moving a lot, kids picking up things quickly, FLINCH the show, the swearing Roomba, the Victoria Day long weekend, Christon’s wedding being the same day as Mike Kwan’s (August 31), remembering wedding anniversaries, Sharon, and church stuff.

Eric agreed to give me a ride home, which we reached at 9:40. He definitely helped me wheel my stuff into my place! When I left Deb and Dylan’s, Deb gave me some frozen food because Dylan was thinking of me. Walmart’s Your Fresh Market shepherd’s pie and chicken Parmesan are good, but technically expired since the expiry date is May 7. Guess I’ll have to eat them both soon-ish!

From Julie: Myronisha is a female version of Myron now?!

From Julie: Auri’Noel?!

From Julie: Daryell is Darryl’s sister?!

From Julie: This baby GIRL is named Anakin?! Like in STAR WARS?!

From Julie: Makayla?! BAD SPELLING of Michaela!

BAD SPELLING at the nearby Chateau Quality Drycleaners: COMPFORTERS?!

McDonald’s NEW Chocolate Nanaimo Bar McFlurry! Pretty disappointing: It looks like an Oreo McFlurry and just has a sprinkling of coconut flakes for “Nanaimo bar” flavor, not even butter icing! Does NOT translate well to ice cream form!

M and M Meat Shops has Cilantro and Lime Basmati Rice in a microwaveable package?!

M and M Meat Shops has Brown Basmati and Wild Rice in a microwaveable package?!

M and M Meat Shops has Long Grain White Rice in a microwaveable package?!

Pizza Hut Supreme Lovers: A feast of pepperoni, mild sausage, beef topping, green pepper, mushrooms, red onion, and pizza mozzarella!

Two-Bite Brownies!

From Deb and Dylan: Walmart’s Your Fresh Market shepherd’s pie! Beef simmered in a savory gravy with carrots, corn, and peas, topped with roasted garlic mashed potatoes.

From Deb and Dylan: Walmart’s Your Fresh Market chicken Parmesan with roasted potatoes! Breaded seasoned chicken topped with tangy tomato sauce and mozzarella cheese, served with roasted seasoned potatoes with green and red peppers.

May
15

Had sesame seed bagels with cream cheese, coffee, kiwi fruit, and pears for breakfast today. Deb opted to keep Elysse at home this morning, so we went to Costco after I checked on my place and grabbed a couple of things, including Alice’s FARTING ANIMALS coloring book. I even asked if I could do some laundry, and Deb said I could after she was done with five loads of laundry herself. Deb ended up buying DRUMSTICKS ice cream, Build-Your-Own-Taco kits, Liberté honey yogurt with a certain amount of milk fat for her mom (“it’s not on sale, but it’s my mom!”), fruit, rotisserie chicken, quinoa salad, compost bags, chocolate muffins, apple muffins, Two-Bite Brownies, and many other things.

Lunch: French bread, Brie cheese, DanActive yogurt drink, edamame beans, and Costco rotisserie chicken. Finished my laundry and was relieved to have that done so I won’t have to do two loads of laundry right away when I get home tomorrow. We had fried rice with chili pepper and fish sauce, plus edamame beans on the side for dinner. Later, I entertained Declan and Elysse with the FARTING ANIMALS coloring book (“OH MY GOD!”) – HAHAHA!

From Youtube: Yleen Kennedy?! BAD SPELLING OF EILEEN! Apparently, it’s pronounced “Why-leen” like Auntie Wylene the drawing teacher… WHAT THE?! One of the reporters’ names is St. John Barned-Smith?! Sounds like a St. Bernard dog…

From UNSOLVED MYSTERIES: Kimberli A. Martin works at Ripley’s Believe It Or Not?! BAD SPELLING of Kimberly!

May
14

Coffee, croissants, and a seed-filled bagel with cream cheese for breakfast. Leftovers for lunch, then said hi to the kids when they came home later. Homemade pizza creations for dinner! Cheese pizza, pesto chicken pizza, and hot dog cheese pizza! The original pesto chicken pizza was burned, so Deb had to make another one. Later, I entertained the kids with GREEN SLIME “I don’t know” YOU CAN’T DO THAT ON TELEVISION Youtube videos.

From Julie M. and JUDGE JUDY: Kaelin Hedrick?!

From Sara: Wear ever you go their your?!

From Bored Panda: Jean Bastard-Rosset?!

May
13

I had coffee, pineapple, and croissants with Nutella for breakfast… leftovers for lunch, which is fine! Then I had tiny Yakult drinks, rice, Thai eggplant curry, chicken, green beans, and popsicles for dinner! Declan and Elysse wanted to watch a show called FLINCH and even more POKEMON stuff, which at least kept them entertained for a bit. No, I wouldn’t want to smell durian or rotting chicken!

From Julie M. and Wish: A New Age Retro Hippie phone case!

From Julie: Tattia?!

From Julie: Entwarne?! Antoine would have been JUST FINE! VERY BAD SPELLING!

From Julie: Tremayne?!

From Julie: Jojo?!

From Julie: JB?!