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Archive for the ‘poems’ Category

Cheap reading glasses! / Stew beef noodles! / Z-Grip! / 1000 Touch toothpicks!

July 10, 2019

After COFFEE TIME, I had to go out at 11:20 to meet Mom and Dad for my new reading glasses and some lunch. Mom wondered why I didn’t turn my cellphone on – why not save battery life if I don’t NEED it on all day? She wasn’t impressed when I told her that, but […]

Tupac Isme?! / Tevita Tuli’aki’ono Tuipulotu Mosese Va’hae Fehoko Faletau Vea?!

June 28, 2019

I noticed that Chantelle deactivated her Facebook account AGAIN. Either shit or get off the pot, dude! Paulo dropped by at 9:45 to pick up some Quaker Oatmeal that I’d offered him last week. Then since he was here, he ate some Uncle Ben’s Long Grain and Wild mushroom rice / 2X Spicy Samyang noodles […]

Happy Tau Day! Double Pi Day! / Grammar Nazi / Mallex Smith?! / Wynter Turner?!

June 28, 2019

I went to the eye clinic at 9:45 on a 401 (which I got just in time) for the six-week followup today at 10:45 after COFFEE TIME (20/30 vision is a good improvement even if I can’t read fine print), then had lunch at Yaohan before seeing Rachel at the Caring Place for the last […]

Moritz Seider?! / Slag Lane, Heydock, Merseyside, England?!

March 21, 2019

From the r/canucks Discord server: A German prospect named Moritz Seider?! Reminds me of apple cider AND those yummy Moritz Icy Squares chocolates at Christmas! Moritz Icy Squares: From the Daily Mail: There’s a Slag Lane in Heydock, Merseyside, England?!

Shut your five-hole! / Driving accident near Walmart with BMW! / Nigeria and DJ?!

March 21, 2019

From We Love Hockey and Gayle Prowett in my Fearsome Canucks Fans group: A T-shirt that says “SHUT YOUR FIVE-HOLE” to the goalie! HAHAHA! From Reddit: Driving a black Mercedes in Richmond near the Walmart? Better watch out for those pesky sidewalks… the white BMW has no damage; it’s just snow! From Julie: Nigeria is […]

Diarrhea on a roller coaster poem! / STAR WARS toilet paper! / A cat puke mug!

February 21, 2019

DOUBLE COFFEE TIME! From Julie M. and I Don’t Give A Duck: Roses are red, the church has a steeple. Man gets diarrhea on a roller coaster and splashes 14 people. From Susan and Quotes, Fun, and Sarcasm: STAR WARS toilet paper to clean your dark side! Cat Puke Mug: Some people tidy up and […]

Trying to shit, but only farting!

January 9, 2019

From Whisper: Here I sit, so broken-hearted. Tried to shit, but only farted. Then one day, I saw my chance… Tried to fart, but shit my pants.

Jimmy’s address?! / Walking Bushie greeting everyone politely and leaving!

October 17, 2018

I still have Jimmy’s address somewhere on LJ – oh boy. I’m not going to do anything with it. At least Youtube resolved their problems last night at 8:30 after being down worldwide! The MOTHER 3 Walking Bushie (which casts a Lifeup spell on YOUR CHARACTERS and not itself) eventually greets everyone politely and leaves […]

Hanging out at Boston Pizza for Chinese Eric’s birthday!

August 18, 2018

Today is Bad Poetry Day! Eric M. called me at 12:40 to see if I wanted a ride to Boston Pizza for Chinese Eric’s birthday hangout: a 1 PM BC Lions game against the Toronto Argonauts! Sure, sounded good to me, especially since I’d been going to leave in five minutes anyway! Of course I […]

JIMMY! / Artimece?! / Dayton?! / Devonte’ ?! / Dion and Sharese?! / Maddox?!

July 10, 2018

Last night, Jimmy was trying to start fun times (as he calls it), but he got way too angry and pissed off because I told him that I’d be taking a break for at most 20 minutes (to do the holidays, which he KNEW ABOUT MONTHS AGO!), sent a lot of angry faces, said that […]