Epixome
This is CRAZY LAND.

Jul
11

FYI Doctors called me at 11, so I went there after lunch at 11:45 on a 401 to order my new glasses, which cost $175.78, but that’s better than $506.04!! I got home at 12:20 on another 401. It’s nice to have truly unfettered time for once! (Paul helped me)

From Julie M. and Wish: Dragon Fantasy Master Fantasy Knife Display!

From Julie M. and Wish: Royal dragon mug stein tankard!

From Julie M. and Wish: Antique silver dragon flaying ball necklace!

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Jul
10

Last night, Jimmy was trying to start fun times (as he calls it), but he got way too angry and pissed off because I told him that I’d be taking a break for at most 20 minutes (to do the holidays, which he KNEW ABOUT MONTHS AGO!), sent a lot of angry faces, said that one-word messages sucked the fun out of a conversation, refused to scroll up for proof of what I said (“nope”), and eventually said “done – I can’t do this – goodbye, Leslie.” He also tried to gaslight me about how I never cared about what he said (not true), never asked what he was wearing (not true), and then blocked me after a few more minutes of “who knows what the hell is going on with you up there.” I called him out on being manipulative before he blocked me, since he said “maybe next time you want to talk about something serious, I’ll dip out for half an hour to see how you feel.” He should just have waited the 20 minutes. Either I tell him and get this, or I don’t tell him and get increasingly impatient messages! Not even one year of talking – July 25, 2017 to July 9, 2018! The conversation has now been deleted – I don’t keep private naked pics of people (whom I’m no longer talking to), and I don’t care that his volatile temper problems and fits might be caused by his meds for his brain injury!

No more Uncle Lee’s organic green tea box of 100, two index cards with pre-emptive “good luck” wishes for 2018-2019 Flyers-Canucks games in December and February with your name on them, dollar store Canadian souvenirs (Canada shotglass / Canucks decal / Canadian beaver magnet), practically brand-new red Hilroy notebook for notes with him (what a waste of money!), notebook pages with his Horsham address and various recommendations for and from him, Canucks Fan lollipops and candies, sheet of paper with notes for his Vancouver trip which never happened in May (Wreck Beach / Pho / Yaohan / Big Crazy…), four extra London Drugs reusable bags with two different designs (two small and two large), or Nair! I’m keeping the salmon jerky, though, since I can eat that at any time in the next ten months! Good thing I didn’t mail it to him, which would have cost at least $11 more…

After the ONLINE PURGE (which included my bath accessories), I went out to London Drugs at 4:30, just managing to catch the 401: I got on-sale $2 Arm and Hammer toothpaste x2, 500 Mead index cards (which were needed after the status rewriting), and Original Sapporo Ichiban noodles x2 for use in hot and sour soup noodles. I was back home at 5:10 on a 401.

From Julie: Artimece?!

From Julie: Dayton?! Like the Ohio city?!

From Julie: Devonte’ has a totally superfluous apostrophe!

From Julie: Dion is okay, but Sharese?!

From Julie: Maddox?! Like Angelina Jolie’s kid?!

Jul
09

After DOUBLE COFFEE TIME (and confirming that Steph got Lisa’s and Henry’s birthday cards which I’d mailed them), Mom and Dad picked me up for lunch at 11:30 at Dinesty Dumpling House to have hot and sour soup, white surfboard noodles with choy, and siu long bao. They gave me a lot of unsolicited advice about my life (apparently I don’t need a ride to the eye consultation since it’s not actual surgery AND just need not to look at screens in order to get rid of my cataract – yeah right!), are still under the impression that Steph is going to Beckett’s baby banquet, eye doctors, surgery, technology, and said I could get green grapes on sale at Price Smart. I declined the temptation to go there, especially with my mom, so I got a ride home with Dad at 12:40.

Random stuff from Mom and Dad: A white floor lamp (which Dad at least helped me plug in), an old toaster, candy canes, a half-bag full of candy conversation hearts, a package of Nutella and Go! pretzels, a Mr. Munchy milk chocolate Easter bunny with rice crisps, a box of 12 Quaker Quick Oats instant oatmeal packets which expire in January 2019, a box of 12 Quaker Regular instant oatmeal packets which ALREADY expired in November 2017, eight double rolls of Purex Ultra 3-Ply toilet paper, a black Stormtech fall / winter jacket which will replace my white zip-up Stormtech fall jacket (it’s MORE THAN FINE to throw things out which don’t work for me…), a purple Tabi International coat, a handmade (?) purple yarn vest, a light brown Paraphrase petite flowery wool vest, a random white comb (I almost typed BOMB), and $10 cash.

Also: FUCK EMERGENCY POOPS, MUCH-NEEDED QUICK SHOWERS, AND RUINED PANTS AND UNDERWEAR!

From Julie: Ashley, Franchell, and Esteban for a black guy?!

From Julie: Shaheed?!

Jul
08

I showered today.

Obra S. Kernodle IV?!

Obi-Wan Kenobi is NOT Jesus! FAIL!

From Julie: Shontay and Dayshia?!

Jul
07

I called Chrystal at work at 1:10 yesterday to remind her about last night, being honest about how July 12 (next Thursday) was actually just a consultation and not an actual surgery. “SHE BAMBOOZLED ME! NO!” Hahaha! While power-walking through the building and down the stairs, I saw Mr. Creep on his way up the stairs! UGH! I just managed to get to the C94 bus stop from Brighouse library before the shuttle bus got there! Then I had to wait ten minutes for the next Canada Line train at Brighouse, but managed to see Chrystal at the Broadway London Drugs. We went to Chipotle and talked about baby Beckett (my newest nephew!), my upcoming cataract consultation on Burrard, Emily’s new baby Benjamin (Chrystal’s newest nephew!), my therapy, my messy steak burrito in a bowl, my walking in on someone in the public washroom because SHE forgot to lock the door, my computer upgrade, her parents sharing a smartphone, my parents being millennial phone zombies in senior citizens’ bodies, smartphones, the rain then, and more.

After that, she went to No Frills to meet her dad while I went back to London Drugs to look for gum tubs. I couldn’t find them on my own, so had to ask the employees for help. The Dentyne gum was on $2.99 sale this week, so I grabbed a Dentyne Ice Avalanche 60-piece tub, hoping that THIS one wouldn’t be soft. (I tested it later at the Canada Line station, and it thankfully was FINE! I lost the Excel gum lottery TWICE IN A ROW!) I also got an on-sale bag of Brookside blackberry and honey chocolates as a thank-you for Eric today if his fix worked. If it didn’t, the chocolate was still in my preferred form of bites instead of tablets! Haha! I got home at 9:55 in the pouring rain because I had JUST missed the 401 / 407 buses at Brighouse, forcing me to wait an additional half an hour. After writing some notes to myself, I went to bed at 11.

I got up at 6 AM, decided to get some more rest, and got up for good at 10:45. Then I noticed that Eric had called at 10:25, so I called him back. He’d been out and wanted to see if he could fix my monitor, but he guessed he could go out again. In the 15 minutes available to me, I brushed my teeth / washed my face / took my multivitamin / took my Kraft Dinner White Cheddar macaroni and cheese plus Brookside chocolates out for Macaroni Day and Chocolate Day today / took Eric’s Brookside Chocolates out / tidied up my computer desk area. Eric arrived at 11 with an extra BENQ monitor that used to be his dad Ron’s, and was able to plug in my current monitor while cleaning it with Windex!

He looked up Electronics Return-It centres, and found that the Blundell one should be open on Saturdays, so took out my two old hard drives and old monitor, and accepted my chocolate as a thank-you while never guessing the CREEP that I saw at the library yesterday. Eric did say that he thought it was the circuits or something from the monitor itself. After a while, I went to Brighouse library on the C94 at 3:20 in order to hopefully get the Facebook status tagging backlog done using their IP address. IT WORKED BEFORE CLOSING TIME AT 5! I was in time for the 4:45 C94 on the way back to Brighouse Station, and was finally home at 5 on a 407.

Edit at 7:30! I finally got Mom on the phone to see if they had a floor lamp while I remembered BEFORE lunch on Monday. She said “of course,” and at least clarified what I meant. Yes, one that is on the living room floor, NOT one for the bedroom! (which I wouldn’t even call a floor lamp, but anyway…) At least now I can be picked up at 11:30 in the courtyard instead of having to leave 45 minutes early because of bus schedules! She said stuff about a used vacuum cleaner which still works for $10 at the thrift shop, a toaster, my pre-surgery consultation (which I told her FOUR TIMES that I had rescheduled for July 26 – their moving date), Auntie Wing Yee and Uncle Joe moving in with Holly / Peter / Evander / Everett in Steveston, Jon and Harmony maybe needing help on Thursday because the lards will get their Burnaby keys then, and eye care.

Chipotle steak burrito!

60-piece Dentyne Ice Avalanche gum!

From Julie: Travers Mackel?! Reminds me of Kim Traverse from elementary school…

Jul
07

Pooping at the library, aw yeah!

From Andrew M.: It’s a good thing farting isn’t contagious like yawning is. That would be terrible for everybody.

Kelli E. has a Facebook friend named Keerstyn Taafe?! BAD SPELLING of Kirsten or Kirstin!

From Julie: Keaundra?!

From Julie: Nica?!

Jul
06

When I got up today at 7:15 AM, I found that my computer wouldn’t go off Hibernate Mode for some reason – I even did a hard reboot of the thing! Then I thought it was possibly the monitor going screwy AGAIN like it did in late April. I went back to bed to rest some more while thinking of the worst-case possibilities in my head (NEW MONITOR EXPENSE?!) and waiting for a decent time to leave a voicemail with White Eric. I did that at 8:30 AM (saying that I needed him to work his magic with my computer monitor again) after I noticed that the light on the monitor was still blue and blinking. He called me back at 9:05 and said that he could come over tonight after work, but I knew he wouldn’t be able to make it before 6:45 (which is when I’d have had to leave to meet Chrystal), so tomorrow night is THE TIME OF HOPE! I also found my red chili pants from Sears!

I drafted my August fact statuses on index cards, had COFFEE TIME, and called FYI Doctors to get a final price on the new glasses, even if they had to call the Ministry to find out if I was covered or not. THE PRICE IS $150! Less than the $175 I thought, but still… I left in the hot weather at 2:30 for Richmond Centre, just barely managing to get the 401, and going to KFC in the food court since it’s National Fried Chicken Day today. I let the cashier upsell me to two pieces of fried chicken (a thigh and drumstick) instead of one: $2.95 vs. $5.64? Then I went to the library on a crowded 410; I updated CANUCK NATION, Steph, Julie M., Jimmy, Andrew M., and HS’s Discord / wondered why Debbie S. would add me on another Facebook account / tagged some statuses that needed it. I swear the Facebook status jail thing is based on IP address! Now I’m leaving to pee and then meet Chrystal for dinner. I hope I don’t miss the C94! I also did NOT delete Mom and Dad’s old library card number and PIN from my Important Stuff Entry, which is good – I wrote it down in my notebook, and will duplicate it later at home! Good thing they didn’t change the PIN! I should have remembered it earlier!

Jul
05

I showered and did laundry today.

Maverik Buffo?!

From Julie and CAKE WARS: Waylynn Lucas?!

From Julie: Hey, here’s a Jack Wang who is the vice-president of a Buddhist group! My brother and white Eric used to know a swimming classmate named Jack Wang.

From Julie: Aleaiah?! Such a bad spelling of Alia!

From Julie: Ajja?!

Jul
04

From Janet, AKA ghost_light: A sign outside El Arroyo in Austin, Texas! “Crap, that’s due tomorrow?” – Thomas Jefferson, July 3, 1776

From Rock 101: The world’s largest burger was cooked on July 4, 2011. 600 pounds or six hundred pounds!

Mike Diaper?!

Jul
03

I showered today.

Reverend Hobbit Forrest?!

From Julie: Adonis?! That should really be left to books and mythology…

From Julie: Tanika?! (T A N I K A) I almost misread that as Tanka…

From Julie: Tierra?!

From Julie: Ay’Vah?!

From Julie: Brittanie?!