Epixome
This is CRAZY LAND.

Not waking up at 7 AM is NOT BULLSHIT! / Krista AGAIN?! / Scamp’s beloved Mr. Beary

When Mike got here at 6:30 last night, I was not in the mood for being told that he didn’t know what I was thinking lately with the “no 7 AM wakeup” rule when crossing the border (and saving time in HIS view), so I yelled at him with emotion for a bit. Then we talked about love, making food, coffee / caffeine, marijuana, Children of Bodom, some insulting Christmas gifts for Marek, Mount Gay rum, making him smell the minty London Drugs melatonin, his being unable to accurately locate his laptop tools (of course), bowtie pasta being made out of lasagna ends, his having beer / pretzels earlier, his going to the States with Krista and Ryan (WHAT THE?!), and the concept of “our time.” We also discussed breakup ultimatums, no bargaining for sex, changing my FB account, having the potstickers as fried stuff, the peanut oil, cables, wires, Hagen’s December hours (he thanked me for looking it up – but it wasn’t what he wanted?! STOP BEING SO PICKY!), showing his love by cooking for me, and my waking him up from a dream where he was eating Korean food with Charlie Sheen and the guy who plays Alan on TWO AND A HALF MEN. I tried calling Chrystal, but her mom said that she was in a program and living elsewhere; okay, then!

Mike and I discussed an antenna which is the same size as the one on my router, flashlights, his need for Advil, anti-depressants, heartbeats, headaches, the computer keyboard “coming out of the closet,” the tomato sauce which he’d made last week sometime, TWO BROKE GIRLS, Viagra, prostitutes, Ecstasy, birth control, and not knowing a password. We also talked about Black Friday deals, some pasta machines unable to do penne (?!), Blu-Ray technology, garlic, the oil BLEND, our somehow using up a box of salt really quickly, Italian food, more Ling Ling potstickers with Splendido gnocchi past midnight, and Amazon not working on his computer. Conversed about pee parabolas, the client’s computer job not being urgent, a “back door” way to gain access if he didn’t know the password, that NATURAL HARVEST cookbook which features recipes on how to cook with semen (he’d wondered what sick friend had showed it to him – IT WAS ME!), going to Superstore tomorrow to find that the items which were on sale last week have magically appeared on the store shelves again, SOUTH PARK, waking up in the morning, his sleeping at 5 AM, my not wearing chapstick, and a bitter taste in his mouth.

Splendido gnocchi!

Splendido bowtie pasta!

Scamp’s beloved Mr. Beary.

NATURAL HARVEST:

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