Epixome
This is CRAZY LAND.

Lazy Cowpoke, Frank working, bleached bones, Enrich Flavor

Here’s a post by Tomato comparing MOTHER 2 to EARTHBOUND, ending-wise.

Three dead angels in the Cave of the Past!

This is what happens when you die: “Ness! It looks like you got your head handed to you.”

Giygas, right after you defeat him:

The war against Giygas is over!

Things in the EARTHBOUND universe have moved on since your party defeated Giygas! Let’s call the Stoic Club from the Tenda Village! “Yo, this is the Lazy Cowpoke Stop ‘N’ Go.”

“Yeah, we’re a new truck stop… we just opened…”

“What’s that? The Stoic Club? That lame old place shut down ages ago!”

“We totally remodeled the place!”

“Now we’ve got loud music, great food, and really rowdy crowds…”

“Listen, buddy, I’m too busy to talk to you right now!”

“Just drop by anytime! You come, you enjoy… I promise!”

So let’s drop by Summers to see what’s up! “This is now a truck stop. Absolutely no minors admitted.” Oh.

The Management, “The Lazy Cowpoke Stop N’ Go”

If you left one of the Shattered Men alone in the Summers museum, you can still fight him at the end of the game! (the only enemy left in the game; taken from a Youtube video)

At the beach in Summers: “Only a tanning pro like me is able to get an actual suntan on the palms of his hands!”

Giving the Letter From Tony to Jeff, in Saturn Valley: “Ah, Ness, you’ve read it already.”

“That Tony has a heart of gold…”

While we’re here, let’s call Escargo Express! “Hello! This is Escargo Express.”

“Tracy doesn’t work here anymore. Yeah, she used to work here, part-time.”

“Huh? This is Ness? Tracy’s big brother?”

“I’ve heard about the great work you’re doing.”

“It’s an honor to talk to you, sir!”

“Oh, you’re calling for a delivery? I’m very sorry.”

“My wife is out on maternity leave, so I’m taking care of my other kid.”

“I decided to take some time off from the delivery business.”

“It’s right next to the fridge! Put it into the microwave… that’s it.”

“… Sorry about that. I’m a little busy right now, as you heard.”

“I really would like to hear some of your stories.”

“Zoicks! That was the dog’s food!”

” *Crash!* Hey, hey! Now look what you’ve done!”

“… I’m sorry. I have to go. Goodbye. (Click!)”

Let’s see what happens when we call them back! “Beeeep…”

Hey, our old pal Frank of the Sharks gang is working at the Onett burger joint! “Hello sir, how may I help you? … Uh… Aren’t you Ness? After our battle, I became serious, and have been working very hard. I’ve even been doing some training for… for… Well, a little bit of pro wrestling. It’s the ring for me, baby. So you made it back alive. You must have many stories to tell. Let’s get together for a drink when you have a chance, so I can hear your stories. … I’m talking about drinking mineral water. I’m still under age, you know.”

Mr. Monotoli is now working as an elevator man in his old Fourside building! “Oh… Ness… Paula… I’m Geldegarde Monotoli. Don’t you remember me? I returned this building to Mr. Enrich Flavor. Now I’m working as an elevator man. I’m very happy, and it’s good to be alive. I heard of your many successes. Wonderful.”

Electra the maid: “Thanks for dropping by even though there’s nothing to do, honey.”

Enrich Flavor, at the top floor of his building: “You’ve brought the town of Fourside back to life. I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. Thank you.”

This bear won’t attack you. He’s stuffed!

Pokey’s dad Aloysius Minch is hanging out at Jackie’s Café in Fourside! “Wheeee! Hic! Ness. Pokey left me, his own dad, and just disappeared. If you see him, tell him that he should take better care of his father. Don’t tell my wife in Onett that I’ve been spending my time here. Hic! Wheeee!”

I don’t think he needs to worry about our telling his wife Lardna, since she’s hanging around at home with a Mr. Prettyman!

Lier X. Agerate has some advice: “You’re being vain, Ness. Life is… Not that easy. You just saved the Earth from a crisis… Don’t act so stuck up. … When I was younger, I too saved the Earth many times. I live a modest life. That’s the way it should be. Don’t you think a real hero is someone like me? [Yes] When you grow up, why don’t you become my partner and we’ll make lots of money. [No] Ness, don’t be such a snob!”

While we’re at the Onett hotel, let’s call Mach Pizza from the hotel phone! “Hello! This is Mach Pizza! Our delivery men got tired and quit. So, we decided to close the shop. Thank you for consistently using us for all of your pizza needs.”

Yesterday, this Onett kid finally became a hideout member! “Please come back and visit.”

At the Onett drugstore, you can find one of a very few typos in EARTHBOUND… look carefully.

You can go into the Mr. Saturn’s house at Happy Happy Village now! “Hi, you.”

Meanwhile, Mr. Carpainter is hanging out with the cow at Happy Happy Village! “Hey Ness, it’s been a long time. Since we last met, the whole town has woken up. The best happiness comes from being free… you kids made me realize that.”

NPC in Happy Happy Village: “Wow, it’s been a long time. Your cap… Do you ever wash it?”

After you drop Paula off at home in Twoson, her dad says that you should continue dating her! “You’re a very strong young man. My opinion of you has changed. Perhaps you should continue dating Paula. Just treat her right… Come by and visit anytime. You can even sleep on the living room couch instead of the one in the den…”

Now that Paula is at home, Ness can ride his bike in the Deep Darkness swamp! (complete with special music!)

We can meet up again with Prince Poo in Dalaam: “You’re here! We have little, but stay and rest for a while. But I’m impressed! You did so well for one who hasn’t had much training.”

Visiting Brick Road or Dungeon Man in southern Scaraba: “Welcome! I don’t know how, but my homemade dungeon helped you out. I’m glad.”

The arms dealer in Dusty Dunes Desert (and elsewhere): “Sssshhh! Don’t talk too loud! What do you want? So that’s everything? Keep on the watch for bad guys.”

Talah Rama: “You’ve been exceedingly patient. You’ve overcome many hardships. I praise all of you for your courage.”

Just like his EARTHBOUND ZERO / MOTHER 1 predecessor Ninten, Ness can “talk to” bones in the desert! “I’m just a pile of bleached bones. I can’t talk.”

Dusty Dunes Desert Mine: “They only found a diamond… well, you take what you get…”

Black sesame seed: “Why would you feel like talking to a tiny black sesame like me. I wanna apologize to the white sesame that I hurt before. If I could just see her. What? The white sesame still… loves me?! Weep, weep…”

White sesame seed: “I heard that the black sesame I used to love is somewhere in this desert. If you see him, please tell him that I still love him. Really? You’ve seen him already? Was he okay? … Hmmm, I see.”

Newspaper headlines around the world… ONETT TIMES: “Onett police chief finishes EARTHBOUND, asks WHERE IS THE SEQUEL?”

TWOSON TRIBUNE: “Monsters disappear! Animals calm down! The town is at peace!”

THREED JOURNAL: “Ness and friends made honorary citizens!”

FOURSIDE POST: “Megalopolis Fourside to have another busy day.”

DAILY SUMMERS: “Yesterday was the same as the day before yesterday. Today will be the same as yesterday.”

SCARABA PAPYRUS: “Terrible sound recently heard. Possibly the sound of evil being destroyed beyond our time and space.”

Hint Man: “Well, I want to thank you for all the times that you used the hint shop. It’s been a while since I first saw you… This is my final day in business. …… Well, so long, kid…. No, no… Master Ness. See you again, if fate allows it.”

Hey, the player is in the cast because we prayed for the kids!

Tracy says that someone’s knocking at the door… what an annoying knock! Is this the beginning of the game again?

No, it’s just Picky Minch! “A letter arrived from my brother, Pokey… it is addressed to Ness. There’s no stamp, and it’s not time for the mailman to come… Anyway, I brought it over. It says, COME AND GET ME, LOSER! SPANKETY, SPANKETY, SPANKETY. … I wonder where he is?”

THE END… ? (Nope – as we all know, Porky Minch goes to Tazmily Village in MOTHER 3!)

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